College Happenings

On Sunday I got to go skiing.  It was my first day away from Atticus. 

Well, my first day away that was just for me.  I have spent time away, but it is always at work.

I don’t know if it was the combination of fresh air and getting the blood pumping or the quiet of the mountains, but when I got home I couldn’t stop smiling.  I felt so refreshed.

Atticus seemed happier too when I came home.  He must be able to sense my moods.

The day was just perfect.  The snow was pretty descent and the sun was shining.  It was just great.

Now, I want to go every weekend.  I can’t stop thinking about skiing.  I miss the Anetelope Butte days when Kristin and I would go almost every weekend.

Maybe I’ll be like the granolas I saw who packed thier babies on thier back and skiied.  Ya, just kidding.

I am going to make an effort though to go a few more times this year.

Can women have it all?  That was the topic of today’s Oprah show. 

Elizabeth Vargas co-host of ABC’s 20/20 was on the show along with a few other women. They were discussing women who are stay at home moms and women who go back to work after they have children.

Vargas used to be the anchor of World News Tonight.  After Peter Jennings died Vargas and Bob Woodruff were co-anchors of World News Tonight.  In January 2006 Woodruff was seriously injured by a roadside bomb in Iraq.  With Woodruff injured Vargas took the highly coveted anchor seat.  This was even before Katie Couric was anchor at CBS.  Shortly after landing that sweet seat the world learned Vargas was expecting.

Vargas had an amazing job and she took a step down and a smaller work load with 20/20 so she could be with her children. (she already had a pre-schooler)

She is so lucky that she can have such a great job, one that is flexible and still be able to spend a lot of time with her kids.

Many other women on the show were not that lucky. 

Some didn’t want to stay home with thier kids. 

Some felt that they needed to have a job so that they wouldn’t lose themselves. 

Some felt they were better if they had that time for themselves. 

Some moms regreted working. 

Some moms felt like staying home was the only choice. 

One woman walked away from a six figure salary to stay home.  But she said that she was going to stay home for a year and re-evaluate then.

It seemed like I could connect with every mom on some level.  I want to work and I want to be with my son all the time.  I can’t do both.  I want to be needed in the workplace and at home.  I want to contribute financially, but not so it pays for daycare.

I think for me, the only way I could go back to work full time right now would be if my mom could watch my son.  And that is not a possibility. 

Even if it was, I don’t know if I would really want that.  I wouldn’t want to miss anything.  All the small moments that happen during the day.   His first smile, his first giggle, discovering his hands, rolling over and all the other little things. 

I don’t know if any amount of money or self satisfaction could be worth missing him, and everything he does.

But, I do understand why women go back to work.  I do, I totally get it. 

I say to you today, my friends, so even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: “We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal.”

I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of interposition and nullification; one day right there in Alabama, little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight, and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together.

This is our hope. This is the faith that I go back to the South with. With this faith we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. With this faith we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle together, to go to jail together, to stand up for freedom together, knowing that we will be free one day.

This will be the day when all of God’s children will be able to sing with a new meaning, “My country, ’tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing. Land where my fathers died, land of the pilgrim’s pride, from every mountainside, let freedom ring.”

And if America is to be a great nation this must become true. So let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire. Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York. Let freedom ring from the heightening Alleghenies of Pennsylvania!

Let freedom ring from the snowcapped Rockies of Colorado!

Let freedom ring from the curvaceous slopes of California!

But not only that; let freedom ring from Stone Mountain of Georgia!

Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of Tennessee!

Let freedom ring from every hill and molehill of Mississippi. From every mountainside, let freedom ring.

And when this happens, When we allow freedom to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God’s children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual, “Free at last! free at last! thank God Almighty, we are free at last!”  –Martin Luther King, Jr.

One of my friends told me that Drummond’s are hard to deal with, we’re lucky to have friends.  She said you have to have a backbone to be able to hang out with us.

Maybe she’s right.   

I am so thankful for my man.  I think I am lucky to have someone so perfect for me.  I am glad that he loves me just as I am.  He lets me speak from my mind and my heart openly.  He knows who I am.  He knows who I am and he loves me for it.

He understands me like few people do.

Why is it so hard to understand other people.  To be empathetic? 

I guess, I don’t ever really try to be empathetic, but I also don’t try to deliberately hurt peoples feelings.

I think people think I do.  Maybe it is because I am strong willed, and voice my feelings.  Maybe it is because I have boundaries and don’t like to be walked on.

I don’t know.  It is hard to change peoples perspective of  someone once they have an idea in thier head.

It is even harder to walk around worrying about other peoples ideas about you.

So, I am not going to do that. 

I know the people that matter in my life.  My man and my son, my parents and my brothers and my friends, my true, real you know who you are if you are one of them friends.

Everyone else, if you don’t like what you are watching, change the channel. 

What a difference a year makes.

Last year this time, I was just starting this blog.  I was preparing to graduate and move on to an exciting career in journalism.

I remember reading my horoscope at the beginning of 2006.  It said something like big new changes are coming your way.  I just knew it meant I was going to land some great job and become a great writer and make some money.

Instead, I began to feel queasy.  I remember taking a trip to Big Sky to see my good friends and go skiing.  I woke up the morning I was to lay my first tracks on Big Sky mountain, I thought the naseau was due to my nerves, but nope.

After a day of skiing and feeling like crap, Chris and I headed home to the Bitterroot.  A trip to the grocery store and like 5 pregnancy tests later, I realized I was pregnant. 

This was not the big change I expected.  Fortunately my perfect man was totally excited.  I was totally depressed and dreaded telling my parents. 

My parents were happy and excited and didn’t even mention that I wasn’t married.

Nine exhausting, sickly months later, a miracle.  The best change I never knew I wanted.

And being the trend setter that I am (ha) six of my friends have since become in a family way.

2006 will always be a big year for me to look back on.  We shall see what changes 2007 has to bring.

I do know that I will soon become Mrs. Perfect man.  That is one change to look forward to.

Happy New Year everyone.