College Happenings

I was checking out everydaygoddess, a blog I like and she had an interesting post. There was a quiz to take that determines the state you should live in.

According to my answers, I should live in Wyoming. Odd, cause I am from there, but I don’t want to live there. It is beautiful and all, but really unless you’re a straight, white, conservative male it isn’t such a great place to live. Well unless you don’t mind working at Wal-Mart for the rest of your life.

Here are my results. I was sad to see no Montana on my list. I even took it twice and said I was gay to see if it would add it, no such luck. I bet maybe if I marked that I would gamble my wife and kids away maybe it would show up.

My results:

The Cowboy State – Wyoming

Wyoming – 67%
Washington – 67%
Nevada – 42%
Florida – 42%
California -33%
Utah -33%
Louisiana -33%
New York – 25%

Let me know what state was at the top of your list. Please.

Click below to take the quiz.

What state should you live in?

Created by QuizFarm.com

Today someone asked me how my New Year resolutions were going?
“what new year resolution? ” I asked.
“Oh” he said, ” I assumed you had one.”

So I thought about it. One thing I would like to do for sure is stop smoking so much crack. Just kidding, I don’t really plan to stop that.

For real though, I would like to stop cussing so much.

My boyfriend cusses worse than a sailor. When I gently ask him to think about stop cussing, he says he don’t give an F-word what others think of his language.

I tell him it sounds ignorant, again, he don’t care. Those are his words.

I have decided, however, with or with out him I will try to use new adjectives rather than relying on the always available F-word, S-word, B-word and all the other words I use that I shouldn’t.

In highschool I had a problem with cussing, my soccer coach told me every cuss word would equal a lap at the end of practice. I hate running, I really hate it. So I decided quickly that I could cut out the cuss words.

I did too, it was pretty easy. Everytime I needed to cuss, I simply said cuss.

I would run down the soccer field and trip or miss the ball and instead of a big F-bomb, I would yell “oh cuss” My coach loved it. He thought it was pretty funny and the refs just thought I was odd.

On Thursdays I volunteer as a reading and writing group leader for gifted third graders in Missoula. I work with a small group of kids. They are brilliant. Some of them know it.

My first week working with them I asked them to choose five words to describe them. I suggested some words such as funny, interesting and smart. One girl looked at me and said “um we all know we’re smart, other wise we wouldn’t be here.�

One girl reminds me of Red from Fraggle Rock. She is energetic and always excited. She has an incredible vocabulary and can read out loud better than many adults. She wrights in cursive while other kids struggle to print, and she says things like “I would like to make an inference.� It is awesome! The first day of group she asked me if we could read Moby Dick. I was thinking I don’t even want to read that, I can’t imagine other kids wanting to.

Two of the girls are quiet and sweet and very sensitive. One day I told the group
they were not doing a good job of listening to one another and I thought the two girls were going to cry. I felt so bad. Teachers must have to phrase things very carefully so they don’t upset children.

Working with these kids is usually a highlight in my day. They usually lift my spirits when I am stressed out. Their energy seems to seep into me and I am inspired to have a good day.

I think if I were to start school again I would go into education. Sure the pay is not so hot, neither is a journalists pay, but it seems like it must be very rewarding, especially working with younger kids. I bet there are never dull days. Plus, you get the summer off.

I recently finished reading My Friend Leonard by James Frey. I also read his book A Million Little Pieces. I loved both books and I highly recommend them. They can be read independently, you don’t have to read them both or in any order, but after you read one, you will want to read the other.

Frey captures you and pulls you into his life immediately. His voice is easy, honest and heartfelt. He makes you want to climb in the book and be a part of his life. To help him and then to be his friend. He has had a sad, amazing, hard, crazy and wonderful life. The characters in his books are unique and interesting and intriguing.

As I was reading Leonard I did not want to stop, needing to know what would happened and yet at the same time wanting to stop so that the book would not end. I wish it was endless. It really touched my heart.

I have been carrying Frey’s voice around in my head for the last two months and now I am sad to let it go. It is almost like having a friend move away.

Yesterday I had to take my nephew back, so today I am very sad. So I thought I would think of some happy things to cheer me up. Today I am thinking of my favorite things about living where I do.

Why I love the Bitterroot Valley

The big open sky. It’s true Montana really does have a big sky. You can see for miles.

The weather here changes. We have wonderful wet rain that lasts all day. We have big snows that remind me of being little. Sometimes fog will come down and stay for days. Sometimes everything gets covered in a thick spiky frost. It is beautiful. Trees, fences, bushes, the grass, everything looks like it is covered in sparkly white barbed wire.

I met my boyfriend in the Bitterroot.

The gas station clerks are super friendly. Especially Kathy, the hippie biker chic at Ole’s.

Calf dressing in the summer time. It is the funniest things to watch grown men try to put a pair of whitey tighties on a big calf.

The Bitterroot River. There is nothing like a nice quiet float to cool you off in the hot summer heat.

A diverse population. Hippies, granolas, conservatives, smart people, dumb people, confused people, rich, poor, in between and every religion one can think of.

I have wonderful friends here.

Being able to walk into my bank without any id or checks and still being able to get money.

Dread

Dread, that is what I am feeling today.

I woke up this morning and looked at the calendar. Two more weeks until school starts. The thought of it makes me tired.

When school starts I will maintain my two jobs, continue to write here, design for the Kaimin (the school newspaper), work on the Montana Journalism Review and take a full load of classes.

I am not looking forward to it. My stomach is queasy at the thought.

I don’t know why I freak myself out about it. I know I will be fine. I’ll manage my time and get organized and I’ll be ok. I’ll probably call my mom and my friend Kristin and cry to them for the first two weeks. They’ll assure me that I am smart and strong and I will get through.

I know the whole routine, so why I am getting so nervous?

My nephew is the cutest thing ever. I know everyone thinks that their child or niece/nephew is the cutest, but Rady really is. I can see my brother in him and I love that.

As cute as he is though, he sure can wear a person out. I am exhausted and I have only had him for a day and a half. And half of that time my parents have been here to help.

I had him alone on Thursday night and Friday until about noon. In that time I grew a new respect for single mothers. How do they ever get to take a shower? How do they know they are doing the right things?

I am seriously questioning my ability to be a mother. I have always wanted children, but now I am asking myself how will I be able to function on such little sleep. Rady only woke up twice in the night, but the rest of them time I only half slept, listening for him. Is he breathing, oh he cried a little, should I get him? Binki or bottle? Warm milk or cool?

Friday morning I realized I could put him in his walker and turn on Sesame Street so I could shower. After getting him ready for the day I headed over to my friend Holly’s house for some support. She has a four-year-old, so she knows what she is doing.

I told her I didn’t think I could be a mom and she said it is different when you have them from the beginning. She told me how she used to worry and fret when her son was a baby.

Rady liked her immediately. She played with him and told me would probably walk soon. Her husband came home and Rady was all smiles for him. Her husband was perfectly at ease with Rady, holding him and making him laugh and smile. I was jealous. Will I ever be that natural with a baby?

By last night I was feeling a little better. I have gotten him to laugh and smile and he even took a few steps. I am still not sure what kind of a mother I will be, but I have a few years to go before I really have to be concerned. I think maybe 30 is a good age to start. Maybe.

Sometimes when I start to think I am so smart and so great, God likes to send me a message to humble myself. I got a message yesterday.

I went to Idaho to get my 9-month-old nephew Rady for the weekend. His mom and I had planned to meet half way between her house and mine. It should have been about a 6 hour trip total. Two and half to three hours there, depending on the road conditions and the same distance back.

I left my house at about 10:30am. My trip was going pretty good. The mountain pass was snow packed, but I got to drive past a ski area, so I didn’t mind. I day-dreamed about skiing and slowly made my way.

I got to Salmon, the birth place of Sacagawea, ( I just learned that) and stopped to get gas. Before I stopped I saw a highway sign and thought I paid attention to what it said. After getting gas I got back on the road and went straight. I knew the town we were meeting in was 63 miles away.

So about an hour down the road I started to wonder if I was going the right way. There were no signs of a town anywhere. Just open road. No cars, no signs indicating a town, nothing. I started to look at the highway signs and they said Idaho 28. I was supposed to be on 93. But I thought maybe 93 ran into 28 and I hadn’t noticed. Of course I didn’t bring a map so I had nothing to consult. I started getting pretty nervous. I began looking at the signs going the other way and I saw one that said Salmon 75.

Crap, I thought, well I really thought oh F-word. I slowed down and turned around at a point of interest. It happened to have a map and I saw that I was on the wrong highway for sure. I had gone 75 miles in the wrong direction! I was furious! I thought “you idiot Jaime.�? Then I started thinking about how long Rady’s mom was going to wait for me. I was in the middle of no where with no cell service. So I had no way to let her know what was going on.

I started driving about 90 mph back to Salmon, praying the highway patrol was not around. I was completely freaking out now. I was thinking oh man, she is going to think I wrecked and call my brother and he is going to call my mom and they are all going to think something happened and really it is just that I couldn’t read the road signs.

Finally I got cell service and called Rady’s mom. My call went straight to her voice mail. I almost started to cry. I was sure she was going to leave. I thought I was going to get to where I am supposed to be and she is going to have left. Who would wait two extra hours.

Fortunately she is a patient woman and she had gotten my frantic message. She waited for me and still let me have Rady.

Having a 9-month-old is a whole different story.

In no particular order.

The sound of my boyfriends laugh. When I am the one that makes him laugh it makes my heart flip and flop and flutter.

Floating on the Bitterroot River in the summer time.

In the fall when the trees have lost their leaves and they look like skeletons. Just after sunset the sky is a brilliant glowing blue and the mountains and the skeleton trees are black silhouettes against the sky. It is the most beautiful site. I wish I could capture it.

Talking to my boss Steven. If you knew him you would understand why.

Messages on my phone from my brothers. Glenn’s’ are usually funny and Mark’s are just rare. I miss living near them

Knowing my dad is proud of me.

Getting A’s. If I can’t get A’s I don’t even want the grade. I do get B’s but I hate them. Should have put that on yesterdays list. An A is like the best piece of candy in the world, or like presents on Christmas morning, but better, cause I earned it.

My mom’s smell. I know it sound weird. But she smells nice. She sometimes sprays her perfume on pretty handkerchiefs and sends them to me. Then when I am having a bad day and feel like crying, I take out my hankies and think of my mom and I feel better.

My nephew Rady. His smile makes me smile and knowing he makes Mark smile makes me smile.

A day of skiing.

James Frey, author of A Million Little Pieces and My Friend Leonard. I wish his books would never end. He writes so honestly and hear felt. I hope he has more books on the way.

My cat Daryl and his lazy eye and slow personality.

Getting personal mail…you know like letters instead of bills.

The smell of mountain air.

The song “Oh holy night�. It makes me cry, but in a happy way. I wish it was one the radio more than just at Christmas time.

Fresh sheets on a comfortable bed.

The Dude, Walter and Donny.

And of course all of my friends and family. I love you all and appreciate everyone of you.

By the way, did anyone watch Law and Order last night. I love it when you can recognize the real story the episode draws from. Last night was totally the Dick Dasen story with a twist.

Actually lets call it things that annoy me…hate is such a strong word. And you can bet that if I make a list of the things I hate, I will end up doing or being the things I hate.

Wow, a lot of things annoy me it is hard to know where to start.

1. Irresponsible people annoy the heck out of me…especially when someone is irresponsible and it affects me. Examples of this annoying behavior are:
Calling me at 10:30 to tell me you can’t work and you were supposed to start at 10:30. Now I have to switch my whole schedule around to cover your ass.

2. People who can’t control thier kids in public. The more bad kids I see the more I am convinced that I had the best parents in the world…and of course that I was perfect child. My parents never would have let me run around a restuarant screaming my head off.

3. People who are mean to animals…well mean people in general annoy me.
But a specific example is this: Last week someone took a cat put it in a crate with a 16 pound rock and threw it over the California Street bridge. Fortunately that crate landed on ice and some nice people saw it, called the Fire Dept. and they rescued it and gave it a home.
My question is: wouldn’t it have been easier to just take the cat to the pound. Someone should tie that person to a rock and through them over a bridge. Jerk!

4. While we are on mean people, mean customers annoy me. I especially love when they walk in a say you better be fast cause I am crabby. Well, let me bust me ass for you crabby. I know that $2.00 you are going to leave for me will be worth it.

5. Stinky people. I have a very sensitive nose. No, it is not a blessing, it is a curse. Bad breath is the worst. When someone with bad breath talks to me I know that I visibly cringe and step back. I have been known to have no tact, and I feel bad about that. But I can’t help it.
Here is an example of my lack of tact. One night I was out partying with the girls. At the end of the evening an older gentleman who had bought me a few drinks came up to me and tried to kiss me. Instead of being smooth and just turning my cheek, I dramatically pulled away, put my hands in front of my face and went “oh god no!” Nice huh.

6. Drunk people. Unless I am drunk, I don’t want to be around drunk people. You’re annoying and make no sense. If I am drunk however, I probably think you are deep and insightful.

I can’t think of anymore things at the moment. I’m sure I’ll have some more tomarrow.